I miss my baby :(

Pic caption: A scant 3 days old.
I know he's still a mere 7 months old. Not speaking, not really eating solids, not quite crawling, not exhibiting anything even a toddler does but I still have this sinking feeling that every day I'm losing the baby and gaining the kid.

He's progressing so very quickly I can hardly capture all his milestones (pun intended) on film or paper. Only this past week he's learned to sit up on his own. Every now and then I'll glance over at his play area and he's focusing intently on conquering standing at the activity table, putting those chubby leg muscles to work. When I was pregnant everyone told us "the time will fly so quickly" but I had no IDEA! Here it is, autumn already. Soon winter will be setting in and we'll be making plans for his first birthday. It's exciting but deeply wistful. I almost feel I'm not getting to enjoy my baby before he quickly moves on to the next stage in his life. This week I was looking at pics from when he was a newborn and I long for that tiny sack of potatoes in my arms, with his tiny cry and ever-clenched fists. 

Before I had Miles I was the anti-mom. I hated people with kids because of the way they acted. What made THEM think I wanted to see their kids' pics? Why couldn't they keep their brats quiet in public? And couldn't they refrain from boring topics like Susie's chicken pox or Eddie's first "big boy" tooth?!  Now I relish in such conversations - even with strangers! It's true that once you pop one out you gain instant admission into "the Parent Club". People in Walgreens will strike up conversations about anything and everything child-related when they see diaper wipes in your basket and I gladly have 10 minute conversations with them, asking for advice and guidance. Miles has changed my life in so many ways.

Now my heart-strings are being tugged because I see that he's doing just as he should - growing up and learning to become independent. Can I just say I don't like it? I wished for this progress for months: "as soon as he can hold his head up", "as soon as he can lay on his tummy", "as soon as he can roll over", "as soon as he can sit up without assistance" and now I hypocritically want to stop time to maybe go back a bit and relive this first whirlwind of a year at a slower pace.

He's so much more than I could have asked for and WAY more than I expected. Of course, no parent knows what kind of personality their little one will take on but boy was I ever unprepared!!

Take pity on your mom, Miles. Slow down just a fraction of a second and let me savor your moments as my baby, my sugarpop, my little dude. I already feel like you're a "big kid" and, yes, I already miss my baby.